We are all gathered to honor the memory of our dear friend. We all flew in to be together. To be a family. To mourn together. To remember together. To be sad together. To reminisce about the wonderful man who we all lost. Who we will miss so much. None of us wants to be here. None of us want that person to be gone. We’d all like him back.
And we say good to see you to each other. With a chuckle. Because it’s not good to see them. It’s tragic to see them. But it’s sort of good to see them. But now we have this gaping hole. And this is a hell of a reason to see each other. And when they ask How you doing? What do you say? Because we are all crap. We are all desperately sad without words to put to our grief. So it’s almost a joke to ask how you doing? You just say, You know, not great.
Because none of us are. And it’s almost like they meant besides that. That death part. But what else is there? A dear friend is lying there in a casket. Gone. A man who we all knew and loved is gone and this is hell for all of us. But that almost makes it better.
We don’t have to explain our grief. We just have to be there. Be present. And it means the world that we are all there together. And we haven’t all been together in forever. Years. And it always feels like there should be better happier reasons to see each other. But we are all so busy with our own lives that it’s only when tragedy strikes that we all come back. To be sad together.
Because collective mourning brings some sort of comfort. To have all the hugs and shoulders. That helps the healing. That starts the process. And that love is a testament to our dearly departed and our love for family. Who no matter what makes it all a little better.